HOMESICKNESS

I can honestly say that up to this point, I haven’t felt any sort of homesickness. I haven’t longed for America, or certain foods or comforts. I haven’t felt the need to get out of this country to return to my own. I haven’t felt any sort of anger, sadness or longing. Should I feel sorry for this? Maybe. But at the same time, I don’t think so. I am very pleased to find that no matter where I put myself that I can find happiness.

Mazamet is located in the Midi-Pyrenees Mountains. Rolling, beautiful, green mountains. We drive through these mountains with amazing speed, and the town flashes by in beautiful colors. When I am in the mountains, I feel like I am back in Utah. They have their differences, yes. But the mountains take me into the canyons of my home. At the top of the mountain, there is a beautiful lake that sits just so perfectly there. We come here to run, play, and walk around the lake. It’s incredible to say the least. Some of my friends and I decided that we would take an evening run with each other around the lake. Soon we were all at different paces and at different points. I ran off the path right up to the lake and sat on a rock. The music playing in my ears started, ironically, talking about homesickness, and then I felt it. It was a weird emotion. I didn’t feel sick for my home, however, just the people that live there. I missed my family. But I did feel was longing for this home. My home in France. I can’t believe that I am at my halfway point in my journey. Yes. Today, I am halfway. It feels as though I have been here for three days, and also an eternity. I have fallen in love with this town, with these people, and this life that I have created here. I am so happy, and I know that I will forever long for this place.

But then I started to think about how many people were away from their homes, or somewhere that their heart belonged. I imagine that the vast majority of people are far away from where they come from or wish to be. Most people don’t end up where they started, or have the chance to be where they want. It was strange in that moment, to realize this; that most everyone in the world has felt or is currently feeling this emotion. Homesickness is one of the loneliest feelings, that ironically no one is alone in feeling.